Show
affection! Let your children know you love them,
and hug them often. Build
your children's self-esteem. Listen to their
needs and help them develop their own
problem-solving skills. Encourage their
interests and abilities. Treat them as
individuals with their own special qualities. Give
your children some of your undivided attention
every day. Give them a chance to talk about both
the happy and the stressful events in their
lives. Some everyday concerns which may cause
stress for children are school pressures,
feeling alienated, and demands that they succeed
at everything -- sports, school, music, dancing
or other "lessons." Show your children you
understand their concerns and take them
seriously. Have
weekly family meetings to discuss family
activities, routines and problems. Give everyone
a chance to speak and don't allow angry or
negative feedback. Work at problem solving
rather than confrontation. Talk
about any changes or problems affecting your
children, such as moving, illness, divorce,
unemployment or a drug or alcohol problem with a
family member. Explain how you feel about the
situation, and find out how they feel, too. Try
to find constructive ways together to deal with
changes or problems. Seek counseling if there
are serious situations. Use
humor or empathy, not orders, anger or sarcasm,
when asking your children to do something for
you. Examine
situations which cause your family members
stress and try to change or avoid these
situations. For instance, if your morning
routine is stressful, start your day in a less
rushed way. Have everyone get up 15 minutes
earlier, and ask everyone to pitch in and have
lunches made and clothes laid out the night
before. Provide
a feeling of security for your children by
establishing some daily routines. For example, a
relaxing evening meal together or a night time
story. Exercise
regularly or participate in sports. Find
activities that can be done as a family. Make
sure that the activity is of real interest to
your children and not your own interest instead. Don't
forget that your children have problems, too.
They need the same kind of love, patience and
understanding that you do. Remember that what
appears to be a small problem to you may be a
very important problem to them.
Show
affection! Let your children know you love them,
and hug them often.